


Learning As We Go

by inatrice



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Asexual Tabris, Deaf Tabris, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff without Plot, M/M, Masturbation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-15
Updated: 2015-05-15
Packaged: 2018-03-30 15:40:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,528
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3942259
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/inatrice/pseuds/inatrice
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Zevran and Tabris take a step in learning the limitations and boundaries in their relationship.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Learning As We Go

**Author's Note:**

> I started playing Origins again and remade an old Warden and due to my recent identification as ace I decided he would be too. I've gotten way more attached than I ever thought possible and now I'm writing a bunch of stuff, kinda using him as a cipher to work out my own identity and sexuality. So.  
> Also written with LudicrousLegacy's Aurelia Tabris.

Tab smiled as he opened his eyes, looking up at Zevran, both of them breathing heavily. Zevran returned the smile, leaning down and nuzzling Tab’s nose.

“You look so good like this,” Zevran said to him, running hand through his hair. “Lips swollen from my kisses, face flush from our heat.” He bent his head down and pressed soft kisses to Tab’s cheeks. “You are beautiful.”

Tab blushed and he could feel Zevran’s chuckle resonate in his chest. Though they’d been dating a while now, he still wasn’t used to such honeyed words directed at him. He reached up and put his hands on either side of Zevran’s face, pulling him down for more kisses. He felt himself make a small noise in the back of his throat at the feeling of Zevran’s bare chest on his. This was one of his favorite things, lying in bed half naked, making out with his gorgeous boyfriend. It was good to be Tab on nights like this.

Zevran kissed his way down Tab’s neck, biting at his collarbone, leaving purple marks on his paler skin. Tab’s breath caught and his hands tightened in Zevran’s hair. He knew he was making noises and tonight was a night where Zevran didn’t try to quiet him. He tugged a bit and Zev looked up, his lips still parted, gazing at him for a heated moment before moving back up and kissing his mouth again. One of Zev’s hands found its way up to Tab’s and he interlocked their fingers, Tab sighing as their hands squeezed together. Zevran’s hips rolled forward and Tab froze, his whole body tensing.

Zevran pulled away quickly and Tab could see his lips moving, though he didn’t recognize any of the words, usually meaning he was cursing in Antivan. He saw Zevran sigh and he pressed his head to Tab’s chest for a moment before he looked up again. “I’m sorry, sometimes I can’t help it. It just happens.”

Tab shook his head, the normal guilt welling up in his chest like a thick liquid. “It’s okay, Zev. I know…I don’t blame you.” He looked away, feeling ashamed. Zevran shook the hand he was holding and Tab looked at him again.

“Can I…do you mind if I take care of this quickly?” His eyes flicked downward. Tab shook his head, somehow feeling guiltier when Zev asked for his permission. He missed the other elf’s body heat almost instantly, and tightened his legs that were still around his waist. Zevran gave him a questioning look.

“Stay?” Tab asked quietly.

 _Are you sure?_ Zevran signed to him. Tab nodded, forcing himself to keep eye contact. He saw Zevran sigh again. “Okay.” He watched as Zevran quickly undid the zipper to his jeans and leaned back, head bumping against the wall as he freed his erection.

Tab swallowed hard, eyes frozen to the offending member until Zevran gripped his chin and forced his gaze up to his face. “Look at me, amor, look only at me.” Tab nodded again, violet eyes locking with golden. Zev swore again and Tab felt him move as he touched himself. He watched Zevran’s body slowly tense and his eyes fall closed. The other elf bit his lip and Tab took Zev’s hand away from his chin, holding it tightly and kissing his knuckles. Zev threw his head back, his face screwing up with a silent cry of pleasure, his body tensing completely, and Tab let go of his hand and loosened his legs from around his waist. Zevran got up and off of the bed, cleaning himself up and tucking himself back into his pants.

Tab rolled onto his side, facing the wall and curling in on himself, crushing guilt making him squirm. He felt the bed dip and did his best not to flinch from Zevran’s touch. Zevran took his hand away anyway and moved so that he was looking at Tab’s face, hands on either side of the younger elf’s body. After a moment, Tab let himself look up, meeting Zevran’s concerned gaze. “Tab? I should have left, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to cause you discomfort.”

Tab closed his eyes, feeling a noise escape from his mouth. “No. It’s me. It’s all me. Zev…” He dragged his hands over his face and swore as he felt hot tears spill from his eyes. “I can do this! I have done it! I don’t fucking understand. I…” He wiped angrily at his eyes and tried to ignore Zevran’s pained expression, reaching out but not quite touching him. “I want to want to do this with you. I do! Maker fucking damn it. Zev…I’m sorry I can’t. I’m sorry…”

Zevran pulled him up to a sitting position and into his lap, hugging him close and petting his hair. Tab could feel his lips forming words against his cheek between kisses, though the sympathy only proved to make him feel worse. He cried and clung to Zevran tightly, embarrassed at the display of emotion on top of everything else.

The next thing he knew, he was pushed from Zevran’s arms and onto the mattress. He turned quickly to see Zevran’s hands thrown up around his head as his twin did her best to land a few punches, her face twisted with anger. He could see her lips moving, catching a few words. “…fucking told…piece of…ever hurt him…” He sat up quickly and grabbed her arm. “Auri! Stop! Stop damn it! He didn’t do anything!”

Auri looked at him, confused. “He’s here with his pants fucking open, not even wearing boxers, you’re half naked and crying what the fuck was I supposed to think?”

“It’s me,” He told her, looking at his hands. “Being fucking dumb again, okay?” He looked back up at her, his eyes pleading. Her expression softened for a moment. “I’ll talk to you about it later, but I promise he didn’t try anything.”

Auri looked between the two of them, Zevran looking sufficiently cowed. “Fine,” she said, pulling her arm out of his grip. She pointed at him. _You’re talking to me as soon as he leaves. Got it?_ She signed.

“Yes,” he nodded emphatically. Auri watched him for a moment longer then turned to Zevran and said something that he couldn’t see. Zevran nodded solemnly and she turned on her heel and left and Tab could feel the vibrations of the door slamming. Deflating, Tab fell limply back against the mattress.

It took a moment, but Zevran carefully crawled back over to him, close enough that Tab could feel his body heat, but not enough to touch him. Tab looked up at him apologetically. “I’m sorry about her. I’m sorry about…everything.”

Zevran sighed and leaned down a placed a gentle kiss to his forehead. “Stop apologizing, amor.” He held out a hand and Tab hesitated a moment, but took it. “And you’re not being dumb, do you hear me?” Tab glared lightly at him. “Ah, poor choice of words. I apologize. However, being completely honest with you, this is the closest I have ever gotten to a conventional relationship, so we’re both learning as we go, hmm?” Tab nodded. “Look, I…” Zevran stopped himself, taking in a deep breath. “Being with you is what I want. The no sex thing is…in a way, a relief sometimes. That’s all some of my relationships have been in the past. This is more, Tab. If we ever have sex, that will just be a bonus.” He shrugged. “Of course I want to, but your comfort is much, much more important to me.” He brought Tab’s hand up to his lips and kissed his fingertips softly. “I wish me telling you not to worry about it could fix everything, but it won’t will it?”

Tab shook his head. “I wish it did, too. I hate feeling like this.”

“I’m sorry I pushed you.” Zevran told him.

“You didn’t,” Tab promised, squeezing his hand. “It was me. I thought I could handle it.” He watched Zevran’s face carefully. “I know Auri wants me to talk to her, but…I want you to spend the night.” He dipped his head, a slight blush heating his cheeks.

Zevran’s expression softened. He held up his hands and wiggled his fingers before holding up just one, telling him to wait a moment. He reached up to the nightstand and grabbed his phone, checking a few things. He smiled and put his phone back.  _I can stay_. 

Tab smiled, despite himself. He waited until Zevran had turned the lights off and pulled the covers over both of them, before snuggling up against his chest, taking comfort in his familiar smell as well. He could feel the other elf’s heart beating, strong and steady and it helped calm him. Zevran hugged him close and Tab felt him say something against his hair, breath tickling the tip of his ear. Too comfortable to ask him about it, he figured if it was important, Zev would say it to him again. He placed a few kisses on Zevran’s skin and let himself drift off in his warm embrace.


End file.
